Ever stop to wonder what’s in a simple day like today? There’s no guarantee that today will bring about anything substantial. In fact, today could be a big flop on the ground and no one would notice. I don’t know how any of that tends to work out though. It’s life right? Oh life, what are you even on about? I don’t understand you at times. It would be nice to be able to grasp something, even if it’s out of thin air, to understand and realize what that’s all about. But alas I cannot do that. It is life after all, and we cannot really understand anything that comes our way. If I had the ability to realize my own potential, I think I could benefit from it all. But I don’t know how to do that. It’s a shame really, to want to be able to do something with this life and then to be stuck without any reason for it? Yeah, no bueno.
I, for the lack of better words, am just sad and alone. I'm sure there are better words to describe what I am going through right now, but I can't seem to find them. I wish I could simply disappear into nothing. Who knows what I would find there. Maybe I would find happiness finally. I thought I had found happiness twice and it didn't turn out to be that.
So, here I sit waiting whatever comes my way. Hopefully it will be something I can actually take care of and make sense. Maybe it's just not in the cards for me to be happy. Can I accept that? Supposedly God has some kind of plan for me, and I don't even know what that plan is.
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