Thinking

 There are days that are better than others. I find myself looking forward to the good days ahead and not the bad days behind me. The bad days are a reminder that I survived whatever was put before me. I am able to get through the trying times and live in the present.

I need to shave, but don't feel like it. I mean whose choice is it to shave to begin with? Me. That's who. So, if I decide not to shave, I don't need to shave. Having that one choice to make empowers me. I feel like I have control over something in a world where I don't have any control.

Life feels meaningless at times. There's nothing I'm able to comprehend about it, it just exists, and I don't feel one way or the other about it. It would be nice to be able to say no more, no longer will I be bound by this life's meaningless existence, but I can't. It keeps its hold on me, and I cannot let go.

I've compared life to music before. Like music this life continues to play on, there's nothing stopping it, it just keeps going round and round again. It would be nice for the music to stop once in a while to allow me to catch my breath. But at the moment, it doesn't allow me to do any of that. So, I am stuck.

Sometimes I wonder what life would be like without racing thoughts in my mind. Those constant thoughts that I'm not good enough, that I will never amount to anything. Thoughts that cripple me down to the depths of despair. Thoughts that simply don't make any sense to me. I doubt they would make sense to anyone.

Racing Thoughts

 There are times where I cannot help the thoughts that come into my mind. They're racing and I feel like I don't have any control over them. It would be nice to be able to not have these thoughts, but I don't know how to do that. I simply don't have a clue how to not have these thoughts.

I'm sure you're wondering what kinds of thoughts I'm having. Well, they stem from all walks of life I'm afraid. Anything and everything you can imagine (within reason), I've probably thought about. Nothing too out there or crazy mind you, but sometimes just flirting on the edge of whatever it is.

Some might call these intrusive thoughts. Thoughts that pop into my head and I have no control over them. Yeah, they tend to do that a lot. Nothing I can do to stop them I'm afraid, but well what's new in that area of life? Not much at all.

So, I suppose I'll just have to deal with them. If they choose to leave me alone, they will do so. If they don't wish to leave me alone? Then I will simply have to deal with them. Talk about a crazy time to be alive. If I could control what they communicate to me that would be a different story entirely.

Thoughts Which Come To Your Mind

There are at times some thoughts which come to my mind. I tend to wonder where these thoughts come from. Are they simply my own thinking? My own thought process doing its thing? Is it my conscience?

Or is there a higher power that is causing such thoughts to come into my mind? I'm sure I can't be the only person who has such thoughts and questions in these things.

Once such thoughts come to your mind, what do you do with them? Is there anything that can actually be done with the thoughts? Or are they simply warm fuzzies that enter your mind and that's all you need to know about them.

Either way, whatever the cause, such feelings can have an impact on you. That impact can be good, it can also be bad. It's an impact that might need to be acted upon. How we act in regards to it depends on where we're at in this life and how everything will turn out. Until that point in time, just do your best. That's really the only advice I have for myself in this matter. Try not to overthink any of it, which I obviously do all the time, and simply move forward and see what happens.

A Thought Process of Nothing

What is this life exactly? I mean there are so many possibilities out there that don’t make sense. If it did make some kind of sense, we would all be out there without any kind of safety net. A safety net is something you wish you had, yet here we are without the options and possibilities that don’t wish to make any kind of sense. Either way? That’s what this life is all about. Let’s not discuss that which should not be discussed. Unless it is meant to be understood by that which could be grasped and grabbed hold of. It is a time in life which doesn’t make sense. Thats’ okay! Don’t look back across a chasm you have just crossed, look forward towards something which you would rather be looking forward to.

If you have the ability to do something, do it.1 So, there we are. Doing what we all need to be doing. Looking forward to a place where this life will eventually come to a halt. If you don’t believe me, that’s okay. There’s so many things out there which aren’t made to make sense. There are thoughts and lives out there affected long after anything else can be grasped and understood. There are reasons for these thoughts to come across your mind.

Sometimes people come in and out of your life for a reason. Other times they tend to simply leave with no reason at all. They simply disappear. It happens. There’s nothing wrong with that I suppose, but it happens. What else is there to think about when that occurs? I mean, it’s a thing. It happens. People leave. There’s no reason to get attached to any of them. They leave, and they don’t come back. 

Some attempt to come back into your life, but well you have to stop that from happening. You can’t simply allow them to come back in and crush your life all over again.2 Once you realize you are not alone in all of this, it can get easier. Doesn’t mean it will get easier. Just that it can get easier.

 

I think it all has to do with the thought process of how a person becomes what they want to become. They wish people would do what they would do, and then allow things to come across as they want it to happen. Life comes and goes long before and after you wish anything to occur. It’s a thing. It happens. Life will always do that to you. It’s not meant to let you down. It’s not meant to sink you. Life will happen and everything will come to an eventual close. 

So where does that leave us? Where do we belong in all of this? I do not know. I’m not sure.

That’s why life is full of uncertainties. You never know what will happen. You never understand or grasp anything which will fully take place in your life without the thought process that it will come to an end.

 

It’s what happens in life. It all comes to an end. There is no going back. You cannot fix the past, you can only move forward. Move forward and see everything that is out there. So deal with it. Understand that everything which happens, happens. Sometimes you have control over it, other times you don’t.

Let it be.
Allow yourself to breathe. 
Simply live.

Be You

BE TRUE TO THINE SELF. To utter such a phrase unto the which like a person must be found under. Is it not that which we strive to do unto the day of the ceasing breath? Of which I dare say to the audience at hand, do it or be damned.

A night doth not go by where I find myself thinking. Perhaps overthinking upon the likes of which this life will destroy me. Oh to be destroyed long before it even began. That is which I wish for all. To understand truth, one must be destroyed before they are able to build themselves up again. It is a thought, take it or leave it by the way.

It would appear to some this life is a matter of destruction. The kings of the nations of the world would have you believe they are the greatest powers of all. Each raise up armies, navies of the like all in order to reign supreme. But in their darkest of night, how are they able to see that which causes them the most evil of darkness. Riches of the world cannot solve everything.

To each their own. It is a phrase used all too often. If that is actually the case, a person cannot be true to himself unless they have an understanding of what is going on around them. Oh to be able to have that ability. To have that desire within their hearts. Is it too much to ask? I dare say not. There are many things in this life which need to be understood. Grasped upon and decided for the better. If you do not look forward to life with the acceptance of change? Are you even living? I dare say you are not.

If I were to allow myself to speak that which is naught, it would be a damnation to my own soul. If I were to speak falsehoods against my brethren, it would be counted against me. For there are many laws in the world and of the land which are meant to keep people safe against such actions. Again, to be true to oneself you must be able to understand and grasp that which you have been unable to before. Are you up to the challenge? If you are not, then dismiss this as it is and allow yourself to be swallowed up into the empty pit of death.

However, if you are willing to accept change. Believe in yourself to the point where nothing else will matter. To the point where things of this world must be able to change itself and you are willing to accept it. That is something quite different. There are many things in this world, this life, which change. You do not have control over such change. It happens without another thought. That is change. It is what change does best. Altering reality to the point where what once was truth is now a fable. What was a fable is now truth. You cannot always tell when change happens. It will happen when the universe needs it to happen. You cannot also dictate when change will happen either. Just because you do not wish something to happen does not mean the universe wishes it to happen at that specific period in time.

Be wise in well doing. Do not wish that upon your neighbor which you would be unwilling to wish upon yourself. It is the ability to take a step back and see all around you which is best.

On the other hand, if you do not try something at least once you will never know the outcome. Here we have quite a universal complex decision. When life gives you an option, which route will you take? To the right or to the left? Will you continue going forward without question or will you second guess yourself and step backwards? It is all such a complex thought process beyond any comparison of the word.

As it has been done in times past. Life has meaning. It has the ability to destroy the souls of men long before they are willing or able to accept that which they are not. Some would have you believe this life is not meant to be pleasing to anyone. It is meant to destroy you long before you have the ability to decide for yourself.

I would not say this life is easy. No, it is quite a complex matter. With all of the diseases which course through the veins of people, and the anxiety and depressions which come upon people. It is quite easy to curse the mighty creator above and shout phrases of vain meanings. It has happened, it will happen, it is currently happening. Do not assume there will always be peace throughout the land.

There is in itself the option for inner peace. To reach such a desired place, one must accept that which they cannot change. They must be willing to change that which they can and are able. Change comes at a cost. A price had by many over the course of the years. It is nothing new. In order to change, one must be willing to open their mind to the possibility that change is possible.

If a person is stubborn and unwilling to change, they are doomed to repeat the past of which they have such guilt. Yet guilt comes from many different forms. It roots deep into a person’s mind and thought process to the point where they are unable to move. Frozen by the words of those who have taught them such things. To live a life full of guilt is to accept defeat and failure. To me that is unacceptable. But that is my own thought process and I cannot or should not say it is the way one should think.

I am my own person, I have my own thoughts. I do not wish to tell you how to think. It would not only be dishonest but it would be the wrong moral character of me to do so. Perhaps I shall return to this again in the future. Maybe I won’t. There is no saying at this juncture.

BE THE YOU, YOU WISH TO BE. Everyone wants to be someone. Business owners wish to be a guiding force in the world. It starts with an idea. Everything begins with an idea. If there were no ideas, no one would accomplish anything in this life.

Life has this odd ability to make people desire things. Sometimes those things are good, other times those things are not good. Either way, the desire is there. To act upon the desire? That is something quite a different matter. One can have a desire, and that is okay. But to act upon such a desire is not always the best thing to do. Sometimes acting upon that desire or want would be a most terrible action to take.

The mind has the ability to decide if a desire is right or wrong. These are gifts given to each person in the form of a conscience. It’s not always a bug on your shoulder, it’s that quiet thought at the back of your mind...sometimes it’s a screaming thought. But either way? It’s that thought at the back of your mind that helps you decide what to do about whatever action needs to be taken.