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Showing posts from 2001

What Is Life?

Mon Jul 20 02:55:02 AM MDT 2026 I’m thinking again, life tends to feel like a bunch of bullshit at times. I don’t know what to do about that. It would be nice to be able to figure out whatever there is to figure out, but again I don’t know how to do that! I’m feel so fucking frustrated right now. I wish I had a clue about how to get over it, get through it, do something about it. But what can I do exactly? I don’t know. I don’t have a clue! It’s bugging the hell out of me right now. I wish I could do something about it, but again I don’t know what to do. Gah! What are you meant to do with this life when you just feel helpless? I wish I knew. I wish I could…do something about these feelings I am having at the moment. I don’t know what to do with them though? So many thoughts, emotions, feelings, all flooding into my head at once. Too much to focus on, too much to do anything with. I feel overwhelmed. What am I going to do about it? I need to figure out something. If I could do someth...
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Bad Dreams

So I’m having nightmares from the attacks on the 11th. I keep dreaming that I’m back in High School and I’m trying to warn people about the attacks that are about to take place. But no one will listen to me. I’ve hard of survivors guilt, but I wasn’t there…can that still be true if you weren’t there? I don’t know. But something is making me dream about these things and I don’t want to dream about them anymore!
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Student Of The Month

Today I was awarded “Student of the Month” at school. They played some patriotic songs while we waited for the ceremony to begin. My thoughts weren’t on the ceremony at all, I was too busy thinking about all the people who died yesterday and will probably die today due from complications to what happened yesterday. I wondered if they would say anything about the 11th, but they didn’t. It was business as usual kind of thing. The ceremony was nice, my parents were there to cheer me on. I know it’s not a glamorous award, I mean they hand them out every month. But it felt good to be recognized.
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September 11, 2001

Woke up this morning to the news on the TV. It appeared a small plane had crashed into the World Trade Center (one of the towers) in New York. I went to school thinking nothing of it. That’s when the unexpected happened. On my way to school, another plane hit the other tower. A jetliner. New York was under attack. Needless to say school kinda froze at that point. That’s all anyone was talking about. We gathered around the instructors computer and watched and read the headlines on the internet. The news was putting out information as quickly as they could about the terrorist attacks. Then there was the Pentagon. Another airplane crashed into the Pentagon. I don’t know how serious that one was. We gathered in another classroom where they got a TV working. We watched as the World Trade Center (both towers) came crashing down. So many people died today. I can’t even fathom it. What a terrible day to be alive.
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