DreamSense

Ever wonder why this life is so messed up? I sure as hell do! I don’t get it. I mean we’re here for a reason…maybe. I don’t understand anything about it though. I wish I did, it would be nice to be able to grasp something about this life and not simply expect it to be here whenever we need it to be. Yet that’s exactly what we do! We expect life to be here for us and we don’t want to give anything back, talk about an annoying thought process. But what are we going to do about it all? I don’t know. I wish I did, but there are so many things in this life that don’t quite make sense at times, and we are here trying to make sense of them all. It sucks, it really does. But what else are you supposed to do about it? I don’t know.

Life always has a way of doing whatever it needs to do. There’s nothing wrong with that thought process. It comes and goes without a second thought. We can’t easily figure out why life does this to us, we have to understand something at some point, but if we don’t? Well, no harm no foul. It’s life and we have to continue going forward to see everything that is out there. There’s nothing we can do about it. Life will move foreward without the ability for us to do anything but wonder what this life will eventually be like in the far distant future. Oh what a joy that could bring about. If life has a way, we will be able to get from point a to point b in no time at all. It feels like a circle at times. A = B = C, isn’t that what the crazy future guy in Star Trek: Voyager tried to explain? Yeah, something like that. It’s quite an interesting thought process to be sure. It’s life though, nothing can be done about it. So let life be what it wants to be, there’s nothing wrong with that tho...

I am rather anxious today. I think it has to do with the medication(s) I am on at the moment. Doctor changed some medications, added some, did some other things put me back on medications I haven’t been on in a while…the same ol’ same ol’. Anti-Psychotic meds work wonders when they work, they’re amazing. When your mind doesn’t want them to work? Well, that’s when things become quite a problem. I hate to admit it, but life doesn’t always work the way we want it to work. What can I say? It’s a mess at times. There’s nothing wrong with that, but to say it’s not complex is a complete overhaul of whatever there is. Talk about a mixed bag of nuts. Someone doesn’t understand everything there is to understand about it all. If I wasn’t anxious, today would be a better day than it is. But, well I am so there’s nothing I can do about it. I wish there was…but there isn’t so I’ll just have to deal with whatever comes my way. Such a bummer if you think about it all. Nothing is ever cureable. Every...

I often wonder why this life must be so difficult, I don’t quite understand it at times, I mean we’re here right? So that must mean something , but I’m not sure I understand what that something is? If that makes sense. I wish I had a clue what to do about it. I mean, come on, there’s got to be a way to get through this life without us constantly going to war with each other. Whatever the problem is in life, we have got to find out a way to get past it. It’s got to be made manifest in some shape or form. I do not understand why this life has to be the way it is, it feels so different than anything else in this universe, at least to me it does. Maybe I’m not making much sense, but I do know this. If we don’t grasp life and understand it, we will be left with nothing. Do we want to be left with nothing? I’m not sure we do. If we are left with nothing, what’s the purpose of this life? I’n not sure I can justify an answer for that. It would be nice to be able to figure out something in th...

Why is life this way? I often wonder what’s going on with it, but I don’t have a clue how it’s meant to be at times. I wish I had a clue, honestly. But I don’t, so what’s the point of it all? If It’s meant to be a curse then let it be a curse. But, if it’s meant to be something different? Let it be different. Don’t let it be what you want it to be, be what it’s meant to be. Allow life to be whatever it needs to be, there’s nothing wrong with that. There are things in this life we don’t have control over, and that’s okay! If we can simply allow ourselves to become the better person, then we can allow such a life to continue. We can allow it to make us and form us, shape us even into the people we’re supposed to be.

Oh boy, more drama. I don’t understand it. I don’t get it. It’s life, yes, but it doesn’t have to be this way! I sure hope we don’t get evicted because someone else decided that we were doing something we weren’t doing at all! Seriously, what the heck! I don’t get it. I wish life wasn’t this way, but what can I do about it? I don’t know. It would be nice to be able to figure out what’s going on in life right now, I don’t have an exact clue what’s happening but I want to know! Is that too much to ask? Yeah, I didn’t think so. So many wrong things going on and I simply don’t know how to go about addressing them. It would be nice to be able to figure something out. Why are so many people against us? What did we do to deserve this? Man, I wish I knew!

Monday, September 21, 2026 I don’t want to think today. Is that too much to ask? I’m not sure it is. It would be nice to be able not to think for one day. I’d rather be think-less. Is that a word? I’m not sure it is. Spellcheck doesn’t think it is. Oh well if I want to make up new words? So be it. Or maybe I’ll add a hyphen to it! Yeah that will show them! Life doesn’t have to be this way. Everyday, all day. It’s a shame. It has to be something else…something better than anything else going on. I wish I didn’t care about certain things that overwhelm me. They aren’t important things to begin with, so why am I thinking about them to begin with? I don’t know, I don’t have a clue. Should I have a clue about such things? I’m not sure if I need to. It comes and goes in waves. Life will eventually come to a stop for everyone. Be it a supernova, or simply death deciding to catch up with those who’s time it is to go. Funny how that tends to work out. The whole death thing. It doesn’t have t...

If life had a way to conquer our mind, what would that look like? I’m not sure I quite understand what’s going on with it all, just that we have to be able to figure out what it’s doing at any given moment. I wish I could understand and grasp what it’s doing to us, but if we can’t explain that…what are we even doing here? I simply do not know. I wish I had the ability to understand and grasp what this life has in store for me, but then again I don’t think I can do that. It’s life after all, I mean come on now. What more do you want from it? Exactly.

Sunday, September 20, 2026 Wake up Neo… The Matrix Has You. Those famous words were penned and screened into a movie. Life is a simulation it screamed. You aren’t really living in the 90s, it’s far into the future; and you’ve never used your body before. You’ve been plugged into a machine for who knows how long. Since you were hatched from the long line of machines that are in the real world. So, which pill do you take? The one that allows you to go back to sleep and enjoy reality as you think you know it, or take the pill that lets you see the real world as it really is. It’s up to you. The question is posed. What would you do if you woke up in a simulated world? It doesn’t have to be the matrix, it can be anything you want it to be. Of course if this were a real situation you wouldn’t have the ability to choose all of the circumstances of the simulation. If I had the ability to do what I was meant to do in this life, be it fake or real, I wouldn’t stop at anything. I owuld try ...

Oh what a life this is, I’m not sure what to think about it, but it is something. I wish I could figure out exactly what this life is meant to be about, but I do not know. It is something quite different from the rest of life, that much is true. But life will be whatever it wants to be and I have to live with that. So I will. It’s nothing to get worked up over mind you, just keep that in mind. Life will be whatever it wants to be and that’s what it will always be. Nothing too complex, nothing out of hand, just a life full of amusing thoughts.

Life tends to come and go and we don’t have the ability to see what’s all going on there. Life will always continue to be whatever it wants to be, we don’t have the ability to do what we want. It’s life after all. Nothing beats wanting to escape this life, but we can’t always do that. There’s always something in the way that may drive us crazy at times. It’s life after all, there’s nothing wrong with that thought process, but it will be crazy if it is. Talk about crazy times that come along and we don’t have the ability to actually see what’s going on in this life. Ya know? Yeah, that’s what I was thinking about. It’s life, we don’t always have the ability to grasp it fully. That’s life.

This is such a silly life at times, we don’t always know what’s going on with it. That’s okay though! If life were meant to be other than silly, we wouldn’t have a clue about anything now would we? No, I didn’t think so. That’s what this life is all about. It’s meant to be strange at times and when that happens, we have to sit up and take notice. If we don’t? Then we’re pretty much in trouble. That’s just how life goes at times though. I don’t blame anyone but myself when that happens. It’s life and there’s nothing I’m able to do about it. So I don’t even bother.

It’s a life we live, that’s what’s important in this life I think, it’s the best possible outcome at least. If we don’t understand that much about life, then what are we supposed to do about it? I mean, come on now. We’re meant to live and see what’s out there, aren’t we? One would think so! If we can’t do that, then we’re lost souls on this river, or ocean even and we cannot get past it all. We are lost at sea as it were cast about the waves unable to get past whatever it is we’re meant to get past. So, let’s live life to its fullest. Don’t overthink things, don’t allow yourself to become corrupt in such thinking. Supposedly not everything is black and white, I’m not sure how that works exactly. I wish I could have a handle on it all, but I don’t know how that tends to work. So I forget whatever is meant to be and I will understand it as it’s meant to come to me, if at all.

Life is but a nutshell at times, there isn’t anything we can do about that. It would be nice to be able to do something, but well I don’t know how to do that. It’s life after all, nothing important nothing special. It’s meant to be something quite different I presume, but what exactly? I do not know. It would be nice to know for sure.

Mon Jul 20 02:55:02 AM MDT 2026 I’m thinking again, life tends to feel like a bunch of bullshit at times. I don’t know what to do about that. It would be nice to be able to figure out whatever there is to figure out, but again I don’t know how to do that! I’m feel so fucking frustrated right now. I wish I had a clue about how to get over it, get through it, do something about it. But what can I do exactly? I don’t know. I don’t have a clue! It’s bugging the hell out of me right now. I wish I could do something about it, but again I don’t know what to do. Gah! What are you meant to do with this life when you just feel helpless? I wish I knew. I wish I could…do something about these feelings I am having at the moment. I don’t know what to do with them though? So many thoughts, emotions, feelings, all flooding into my head at once. Too much to focus on, too much to do anything with. I feel overwhelmed. What am I going to do about it? I need to figure out something. If I could do someth...

Thu Jun 25 01:41:13 PM MDT 2026 Today feels like there are so many difficult things going on, and I don’t know how to even do that! It’s annoying at least, but what am I supposed to do about it? I don’t know. Life will always be what it will be and that’s all there is to it. I mean, come on. If I had the ability to make this life listen to me, do you honestly think I would be here thinking about it all? I highly doubt it. There’s nothing in this life that will make me want to understand it less than someone in my face yelling at me telling me everything will be “fine.” Yeah, that doesn’t fly for me. Not at all.

Mon Jun 22 01:04:57 UTC 2026 Ah, a brand mew day is here! This I can handle. I didn’t hear from the kids, kinda expected that. I never hear from them on Father’s Day. It’s whatever. I deal with it and move on is all. Nothing big. Nothing major. Nothing too crazy. I really shouldn’t be surprised by any of this. I mean it is what it is. I know I can call them but they’re probably celebrating that other man who they call Dad. Gah! I hate overthinking this. It’s like this every year. I need to stop thinking about it. That’s all there is to it! Mon Jun 22 08:10:05 AM MDT 2026 Welp! Back to work I go. Doesn’t mean it’s not useful of course, work is a good thing at times. I wonder how it all would go down if there wasn’t work? I mean that could be kind crazy right? Yeah, that’s what I’m thinking! Well, the kids did eventually call last night, around 10 PM. They didn’t have much to say. They never do. They never know what they’re doing or are up to. It can be frustrating at times. Maybe ...

Commander Kim R’Jor knelt down, she rested her hand on her abdomen. It was in searing pain. “Captain.” She yelled out. Burke came running. “Commander? What is it?” “I don’t know sir.” She said. “I was standing there, and suddenly I felt this immense pain.” Burke looked around the cell they were in. He couldn’t find anything out of the ordinary, it was a simple Dominion holding cell. The force-field was a bit on the shocking side, you could easily get yourself singed. But other than that, it was a holding cell. “Vorta!” Burke yelled to a camera. “I want to talk!” A door opened and the Vorta in charge entered the holding area. “Yes captain? What can I do for your?” Burke held his restraint, he wanted to punch the Vorta though the force-field but knew that would be impossible. “She needs medical attention.” Burke said. “You’ll help her.” The Vorta shrugged. “If I don’t, what will you do? You’re in a holding cell, there’s no where for you to go.” Burke rested his hands on his hips....

Sun Jun 21 00:22:48 UTC 2026 Another day is here. That’s all there is to it I guess. I wish I had the oomph to do something good in the world. I’m not sure what that would be though. Talk about being in a rock and a hard place. However that phrase goes, yeah that! It comes to reason that life is cruel at times. I wish I had the ability to make sense of it all. But I can’t seem to do that at times. It is what it is though so whatever. I guess it would be nice to be able to figure everything out all at once. But if I dis that, where would the mystery be? Eh, who really knows how this world works anyway. I sire as hell don’t.

Sat Jun 20 19:49:07 UTC 2026 Oh what a day today brings. I don’t know what to do about it all. At the hospital right now just waiting for tests to be run. Exciting I know. I just hope everything will be okay. There’s no telling what will or won’t happen in here. Personally I hate doctors. They scare me. Anyone who can tale a look inside your brain shouldn’t be allowed to. But that is just my opinion on it all. See? Nothing too exciting. It’s life.

Oh what a day today has been. I've been sick. Not feeling good. Emotions are running high, feelings are running deep. I have this cough. I am sick. It's just not a good thing. I've slept a lot today. I don't know how else to explain it. That's all that life will become of me. A sick person who doesn't know any better. But what can you do about it all? I don't know. Life has a part of wisdom I'm sure, but I don't know where that wisdom comes from. There doesn't appear to be a way to overcome whatever there is to overcome. I simply do not wish to overthink any of that. But it will happen someday. So we are here, in this life for a reason. I guess that's all there is to it.

Fri Jun 19 02:06:33 PM MDT 2026 Ever wonder what it is we’re doing here? Yeah that’s what I’m thinking. It doesn’t always make sense to me. I mean we live for a purpose, a reason don’t we? If we don’t, then we’re in the wrong business of living. If there’s nothing to be done with living, then we need to figure something else out. I don’t know how that’s all possible though. Life certainly won’t find a way to make things easier or better simply because we want it to…or does it? I mean do we have that much control over this life that we can expect it to be different than it is? I’m not sure I buy into that. Fri Jun 19 03:27:01 PM MDT 2026 I do believe that today has been quite a day. Things have happened and that’s just the tip of the iceberg. I’m not sure exactly what has happened today, just things. All the things I fear. But that’s okay, life will always be that way. It will happen and take place the way it’s meant to.

 

Thu Jun 18 08:35:39 AM MDT 2026 Today is simply a day, what more do you want from it? I’m not sure. It will be whatever it will be and there’s nothing else that can matter because of it. We have to accept everything that comes from today and don’t worry about what tomorrow will bring. Today will never come again. The past is the past for a reason. It will never cease to exist. The past will forever be the past and we cannot overcome that. It isn’t a curse or anything, but a common foe that we must try and overcome. This life will be whatever it wants to be. It will turn out the way it’s meant to turn out. I don’t have a clue how either of those statements work, they just do. So it will always be whatever it wants to be. We don’t have a choice in the matter. Life will come and life will go, it won’t make a difference if it happens today or tomorrow. It will always take place and happen.

Wed Jun 17 08:28:05 AM MDT 2026 Okay, let’s face it. Life can get in the way at times. I accept that. I realize that. It can be a real pain in the ass at times and I’d rather it not be. But what can a person do about that? I don’t know. There are so many things in this life that come our way and we don’t have a rhyme or reason to do anything about it. That’s life for you. It will do what it wants, when it wants and you have to either accept it or deny it. If you deny it, well there are consequences. Oh boy are there consequences for our actions. Whoever said we have “free” agency was wrong, agency isn’t free if there are consequences. Talk about a mind fuck. I wish I could make everything that’s bad disappear for everyone. I’m not sure how that would look though. I bet it would be a complicated mess. That’s the last thing I need in this life is a complicated mess. I don’t need or want that to be going on at all. Life has a way of letting you know it exists, but if it constantly gets ...

Tuesday, September 08, 2026 All-or-nothing thinking (also called black-and-white or dichotomous thinking) is a cognitive distortion where you see things in absolutes—either perfect or terrible, right or wrong, good or bad. In reality, most situations have a mix of positives and negatives, and this extreme “either/or” style can fuel anxiety, depression, and perfectionism. I’ve been thinking this way for years. I doubt it will go away anytime soon. That’s simply how life is at times and I have to deal with it. Well, from that description…it can stem from anxiety or depression. Both of which I have. Sounds great to me don’t you think? Yeah that’s what happens when overthinking is normal. I wish it wasn’t this way. But it is and there’s not much I can do about it. Such is life.

Tue Jun 16 11:25:43 AM MDT 2026 Life feels kind of difficult at times today. I’m not sure what’s going on with it all. I feel like something is out to get me. I don’t know what’s out to get me for sure, but it feels like something is out there waiting to destroy me. I don’t like that feeling. It feels so weird and off at times. I wish I had a clue of what it is all about. But I don’t. It feels like a large weight is on my chest and I can’t seem to breathe. That’s what it feels like. I don’t like it. I’m sure it will go away eventually. It can’t stick around forever. Right? Right? I sure as hell hope it can’t! Tue Jun 16 01:15:14 PM MDT 2026 If I had the ability, I think I would want life to make some kind of sense. I’m not sure how that’s meant to be though. If life doesn’t make sense, who am I to say otherwise. I don’t think I’m allowed to have such a command presence on such a topic. Life will be what it always is. It will either be good or it will be bad. I do not know how it i...

Mon Jun 15 10:29:51 AM MDT 2026 Today is but a day, there’s nothing else that comes from it. It will be whatever it wants to be and we cannot do anything about it. If I had complete control over my life, what would we need for a higher power to be watching over us? We need to have that higher being in place though, at least I think we do. Without Him watching over us, we might screw up bad beyond the point of no longer being able to do whatever it is we need to accomplish in this life. So confused at times, I’m not sure where this confusion comes from though. I need to be able to make sense of something in this life. If I don’t? Then what is the purpose of life? I don’t get it. Sure there are a ton of things I don’t get in this life, I guess that’s just how this life is meant to be? I don’t know. I wish … oh how I wish I could have it make sense to me. But it doesn’t ever want to make sense for me. Do you see the problem I’m facing here? The dilemma I have at times? If you don’t, we...

Fri Jun 12 09:10:21 AM MDT 2026 Today is Friday! (Friyay!) But it feels like they come so slow. It’s sad when you look forward to the weekend. I’m not sure how that ever came on the radar, but that’s what this life feels like at times. I wish I didn’t feel this way most weeks, but that’s how I feel. It would be nice to be able to get over whatever is causing this, but what am I going to do about it? So many questions that don’t have a way of making sense. There is never a way to make sense of it all I suppose, that’s what this life is all about. If I had a way to make the future possible? I would so be on that. I’m not sure how that works though. There needs to be a way to make this life manageable. I doubt there seems to be a way to overcome anything. So many possibilities and thought processes out there, I doubt there is a way to overcome a lot in this life. Fri Jun 12 10:09:44 AM MDT 2026 I wish I could understand what this life is meant to turn out to be! I don’t get it most da...

Thu Jun 11 11:18:25 AM MDT 2026 Let’s talk about what today is. Today is a rather ungrateful day. It’s a Thursday, so that’s got to mean something. Of course I thought yesterday was Thursday. Such a bummer. I’m freezing today. I don’t know how hot it’s supposed to get outside? But I feel cold. I don’t usually feel cold in the summertime. I hope I’m not getting sick or coming down with something. I’m sitting in my office and I have my minky on my lap because I’m freezing! Sami’s friend dropped off some chairs so we have a place to sit now. They’re nice oversized comfy chairs too! Only cost her eight dollars, so that’s what we paid for them. It feels good to have a place to sit in while writing or watching TV again. Talk about a good thing to have around. Last night, I had some crazy thoughts. Typical “life is a simulation” thought process. I don’t know why I am having these thoughts. They seem to come out of nowhere. It just happens to be that way though. I’m not crazy, sure I’ve be...

Wed Jun 10 08:43:42 AM MDT 2026 Life, you’re such a fickle son of a bitch. I’m not sure how you do it, day in and day out. There’s always something going on where we don’t have a clue about what to do. If swearing up a storm would fix things? I would be swearing all day long. But it doesn’t fix a damn thing. See I just swore, and it didn’t do anything. I rest my case. If life had a purpose, what would it be exactly? I’m not sure I know the difference between life’s purpose and anything else that’s out there. To speak of such things, feels rather illogical at times. Why pursue something that you cannot obtain? Maybe that is the goal in this life. See what you can do, and see what will become of it? Not sure. Don’t know. Wed Jun 10 09:33:27 AM MDT 2026 If today had a theme, what would it be? I wonder. I think it would be psychosis is a bad thing that can happen to you and you don’t know how it will affect you. Yeah, something like that. Wed Jun 10 10:37:25 AM MDT 2026 If I had a do...

Tue Jun 9 01:56:22 PM MDT 2026 I tend to wonder what this life is all about at times. I’m not sure I quite understand everything that happens in life? But that’s okay. Maybe if I had an inkling of what this life was about, I could answer my own question regarding it. But I doubt that will ever happen or take place. Life has a tendency to hide when certain things come out of nowhere. If I had my own way of doing things? I would figure it all out in one fail swoop. That way it would be understood without question. Naturally that isn’t the case, no such method exists for anyone out there. Life is tricky that way. It can foul you up long before you know it’s doing it. Perhaps I can try and figure something else out about this life. Something I haven’t thought about yet? Now there’s a thought. I…I don’t know exactly what the purpose of this life is meant to be. Some say it’s so we can be happy. Others believe it’s so we can grow from the experiences we have. I don’t know what any of that...

Wednesday, September 2, 2026 I had to call Walmart Customer Service today regarding logging into my Walmart+ account. So that went…interestingly. An AI bot answered my phone call. They seemed quite attentive to my needs, walked me through getting into my account. We never got into my account, so I have to make a new one. But it was interesting to basically have an almost “human” conversation with an AI bot. I’m sure it will just increase in knowledge as time moves on. That will happen before the AI Uprising of 2030. Yeah that’s when I’m predicting it. We don’t have much time before that happens!

Wednesday, September 02, 2026 I often wonder what today will bring. It doesn’t have to be complex. Just a simple question to be fair. I wish I could see into the future. If I could do that, I might be able to determine which is the best road to go down. Life wise anyway. We can’t all be like Robert Frost and take “The Road Less Taken.” That’s just not how this life works at times. Doesn’t feel fair at times if you ask me. I wish I could see into the future. But I guess if I could do that, the future wouldn’t be special for me.

Mon Jun 8 08:08:34 AM MDT 2026 I’d like to know for a fact what this life is all about. I don’t seem to understand its true potential most of the time. What is one’s own true potential? I’m not sure I even understand what that’s all about. Are we ever meant to fully understand what this life is about? I doubt it. It remains a mystery to us all. Why does life have to be a mystery at all? I don’t get it. I mean it makes sense on some level? But not really. Maybe life isn’t meant to be figured out at all? I mean that’s possible right? Right?! Yeah, that’s what I was thinking. Apricots are delicious! I have some this morning for breakfast, that and toast. I rather enjoy me a good apricot. Cute little fuzzy things they are! I like those and peaches most. Who knows what other fruits I enjoy. It’s been a while since I’ve actually enjoyed some fruit. I need to change that in my diet. Mon Jun 08 09:25:05 AM MDT 2026 If life had a purpose, what would that purpose be? I mean we’re here for ...

Fri Jun 5 07:47:57 AM MDT 2026 It’s another Friday! Or as I like to call it Friyay! Yeah it’s stupid I know, but it’s a thing. Don’t squash it. I’d like to be able to wake up without some kind of rooster going off in my ear. I don’t think they’re legal where I live? But then again, I doubt the neighbors even care. Then there’s the cats. So many cats. Cats with babies, cats without babies, cats making babies. It goes on and on, and there’s nothing I can do about that either. Talk about crazy! I keep having these … dreams. I’d call them nightmares? But I’m not sure if they are at times. They’re rather troubling to me. Some are sexual in nature. Others are just there waiting for me to say or do something about them. I don’t know what to do. I don’t want to have these dreams anymore. I don’t think I think about sex a lot. I don’t know where these dreams are coming from. Then there are dreams that feel like I’m reliving memories. Memories I don’t want to have. I’d call them a previous l...

Thu Jun 4 02:05:29 PM MDT 2026 Well, today is another day. It would be nice to be able to understand this stress and anxiety I have been facing. It’s been going on for far too long. I need it to stop, or find a way to make it stop. Some medication can help from time to time, but I don’t want to be reliant on that medication every single day. I don’t know, maybe there’s no way to get around that thought process? Not sure. Not sure I ever know what this life is all about with these challenges I face on a day-to-day basis. Easier than it sounds, right? Yeah…that’s what I’ve been thinking. Too many damn thoughts in my mind at times. I’m not sure what to do with them all. Some are out to get me, I fear. I can’t let them win though. They need to stay the hell away from me! Life has its ups and downs, no one can argue that point. It’s not meant to be a terrible place to live in, but if I can’t figure it out? What am I supposed to do about it? I don’t know. Thu Jun 04 02:21:33 PM MDT 2026...

Will the Real McCoy stand up please? We have to be able to have a consensus about this life, we can't allow it to simply be and then allow it to become whatever it wants to be because it can't determine what's going on. Does that make sense? I'm not sure it does...but if it did, then I'd allow it to happen. Life has to find a way to become what it needs to become, not what it wants to become...but what it needs to become. Life will eventually get there, but not until it finds a way to make it so we all understand what's happening with everything that goes on in this life. Don't allow life to overthrow itself. You'll regret it, every step of the way.

Tue Jun 2 11:35:44 AM MDT 2026 I’m not sure I understand this life much at all. It would be nice to be able to understand something from this life, but I’m not sure I can even get that far. It will be whatever it wants to be? I guess? Yeah, I’m not so sure about it. Life will just be life. Whatever it wants to be, it will be that. So I will have to deal with whatever comes my way. I guess. Yeah, that’s the gist of it I suppose. I mean, what else can it be? Man I wish the voices would stop. They’re fucking with my head, my mind, my soul even. I don’t know how to get them to stop. But they have to at some point don’t they? I wish they would just go away.

It’s raining outside right now. Supposed to rain all day long. I don’t know what to think about all of that though. It’s rain, I mean we need it…I understand that. But with rain there is so much more to it than that. We can drown in rain if there’s too much of it can’t we? Yeah, that’s what I was thinking. Rain will always be around. There’s no stopping it. Rain woln’t destroy us, God made sure of that promise. I think something about a rainbow int he sky. So He won’t flood the Earth a second time. Talk about a relief. Rain will continue to fall though. It just woln’t be as dangerous.

So the voices want me dead still. I don't know why they want this from me, but it's not something I'm willing to give up. If they were to try to understand the real me, they would grasp that they don't need me gone. I'm not sure they know what's going on with that train of thought. They are simply voices after all. They don't hagve to understand a thing in their own life...if they have lives. If I could tell them one thing, it would be this. Go away. Leave me alone. You don't need to be around me all the time anymore. I think you've served your purpose. But I can't be for certain, you are just voices after all! I know it wouldn't work, but it would be worth a shot.

Thu May 28 07:57:02 AM MDT 2026 Seriously, what is this life all about these days? I’m not sure I understand it at all. It would be nice to be able to figure it all out eventually. But I’m not sure how to do even that. I mean I can guess and guess until I come up with something? But I don’t know how to do that exactly. There are so many things in this life that get confusing and I hate it. I think life has a way of fucking with you, and we don’t quite know how to deal with it when it does that to us. It’s a messed up world after all. I mean look around, there are so many things going on in life that we don’t understand, so many things that we take for granted. So many impossible things that need to be explored but we don’t because they might be supernatural. We tend to blame a lot of things on God. If life goes good? It was God’s doing. If life goes bad? God has a plan for us and we just need to be patient &c. I’d like to think God is up there watching and rooting for us, even w...

Thursday, August 27, 2026 If I had the ability to grab hold onto whatever this life was, I would do it in a heartbeat. But I don’t think that’s possible. Life will continue to be whatever it wants to do and I will be lost finally without a way to escape. Life must come down to a simple compromise. If life wants or needs something, it will have to do that all by itself. If, on the other hand, it wants for nothing? Then it needs to shell out whatever there is to be explained on a simple summary level. If we can’t have that? What’s the point?

Wed May 6 10:35:51 PM MDT 2026 Oh another day has come and gone, and who are we to thank for this good fortune? That’s right. Ourselves. For we are the ones who are able to put the past behind us. We are able to understand and grasp whatever there is to grab hold of. But we must hold on tight. For there will never be another time where we are able to understand fully what is going on in our lifves. I wish I had an understanding of how the world works. How history is made. How things get invented, but I don’t have that luxury. There are times in life where we simply don’t understand anything there is to understand. We must have the ability to grab hold of some kind of meaning. Anything to make us better than who we currently are. I wish I understood what all of that meant, but I don’t. I think if I had the ability, I would find a way to overcome whatever problems I have and seek out the best way of getting there. I’m not sure that’s possible. But I sure as hell would like to try! May...

I’d like to think life would come about and make more sense than it does at the moment, but I doubt that will ever happen. Life comes and goes as it pleases and I have no idea why it does what it does. It would be nice for life to make sense. Depression and all comes about because well I don’t know why it comes about, it just does and here I am trying to over do or overcome it or something. I don’t quite understand why this life has to be the way it is.

Tuesday, August 25, 2026 Why must I be missing my dad today of all days? I don’t get it. I’m not sure I want to understand it. Life doesn’t make sense when I miss my dad. I need his guidance and wisdom around me. Without it? I feel lost and that’s only half the story. We had a great relationship growing up, he was my mentor, my super hero. The one I looked to whenever I had a problem. When things went well I let him know, when things went badly, I let him know. He was my hero. Correction: He IS my hero! Dad if you can hear me? I love you.

Life came out to play one day and I was not ready for it. In fact I was never ready for it. That’s just how the ball bounces around me. I’m never ready for life to happen. So here I sit waiting to see what else life will throw at me.

If I had to choose what to do on a new year such as this, I think I would try and figure out the best possible outcome for a new me. Think about it for a moment. Life doesn’t have to be possible for everything to come together. I mean it helps? But what will this new year bring for us all? I have to simply wonder that. I don’t know myself, but I sure as hell hope it’s something wonderful and amazing!

What exactly matters in life these days? Are there things that actually make some kind of sense? I don’t know. I wouldn’t really know about any of that stuff. I mean come on now, think about it. If life had its way we would all be eaten up by sharks or worse. But it doesn’t have its way at all. Life has the ability to sink down further into the depths of the ocean then you will ever begin to believe. That’s what life will do to you. Sink you till the end.

I tend to find that life is meaningless at times. I don’t know what that is mind you, I just do. It’s not a good thought process to have at times. But I have it so it must be true inside my own brain somehow, right? Yeah…that’s what I was thinking. If life weren’t meaningless, would I even be interested in such a topic? I’m not sure. But there are many topics in life that make us wonder at times. Are we going down the right path, are we doing the right things in life. Are we going to make it through our next trial that comes along? Be it a trial of faith, intelligence, strength…whatever. Are we going to be strong enough to get through it? I often have these questions in my life and I don’t know how to get around them. I wish I knew how to overcome these thoughts, but they keep coming and I don’t have a way of making them stop. So I will have to figure them out as they come to me.

They say life has a way of messing with you. You don't always have the ability to understand what's going on in life. It will screw with you long before you are able to grasp what is going on. But that's supposed to be okay with it all. I don't know how it's meant to be okay, but that's what it is doing and we are but waiting for something to come along and everything else will become whatever it needs to become. So don't allow it to be what it wants to be, let it be what it doesn't want to be. Make it angry, make it upset, don't allow it to become more than important.

Nothing to think about, nothing to display. This day and every day goes away. The way of the dinosuars they don’t stick around. Everything and everyone ends up on the ground. It is but a moment in this life it would seem, no one wants to be in that gleam. So toss away your thoughts, your considerations at best, make life peaceful that is my only request.

I feel like a screw up. Is that good enough to say? I don’t know. Well it’s not good to say that at all I suppose. But life doesn’t feel like it used to. I don’t have a clue why that is. It just feels like blah. Can that be a good answer for everything? Yeah that’s what I was thinking.

Have you ever wanted to escape this world and simply die or get away from it? Yeah, that's how I feel at times. I don't know what to do about it. I need to see a therapist or something. I'm on medication, but that doesn't feel like it's doing enough for me. So I have to figure out...something to do about it all. I don't know though. It scares me. I'm more than scared, if I had the ability to understand what was going on in life, then I could do that. But I can't and that simply seems that life is going to blow up at me in any second now. I wish I could overcome these thoughts and simply make sense of it. Whatever happens, I need reality to be real. Does that make sense? I'm not sure it does. I doubt anything ever makes sense to me anymore. But that's okay. It'll be okay in the end, whenever that will be. If it's not the end, it's not okay yet now is it? No, I didn't think so.

Let’s think about this life for a moment shall we? The important things of life nothing too graphic, nothing too crazy. Just life in its infinite wisdom. Is that possible? I don’t know. How would I know if that were possible? I don’t have a clue about anything else, why would I have a clue about life? Yeah it’s kinda crazy don’t you think? I mean here we are trying to do our best only to find out that something most terrible is going to happen. I wish I could say exactly what the terrible thing is, but I can’t. I don’t know or have a clue. Personally I wish I didn’t know what was going to happen. Well wait, let me back up a second. I really don’t have a clue what’s going to happen. I just know what I think is going to happen. The reaction about it from my wife is just… I don’t know exactly what to think about the reaction from her. She’s been expecting it for a while now I guess. Feels like I’ve been taken out of the blue and things just don’t make sense at the moment. It would be nic...

Why must life be this way? I don’t understand it. If we lived in a utopia, things might be better; but I’m not sure about that. I wish there was some kind of something to overcome this feeling of inadequacy. I doubt I will ever fully figure it out. If I had the ability, I would do it in a second. But I don’t seem to have that ability at the moment. Maybe one day I will be able to figure it all out.

Oh life. What am I going to do with you today? I wish I could understand what’s going on. But I don’t believe in myself much anymore. It’s a crime or a shame or something. I don’t know which. If I did know I suppose I’d have an answer by now wouldn’t I? Yeah that’s what I was thinking. Talk about a rough patch to be going through. But what else am I supposed to do about it all? I haven’t a clue. If you could tell me how the future will unfold I suppose I’ll find a way to male it all coke to pass. Wow, talk about a stress exercise! Yeah something like that. But it isn’t about the thoughts that go inside my head, at least not for now. It’s the things I don’t think about most of the time. Now that becomes scary. I need to go to therapy but I am afraid of doing so. What if they laugh at me?

One would think this life would be easier than it currently is. I mean come on wouldn’t ou think that? Of course you would. So why can’t we each believe in it I for one would want to believe in it. It would give me something to do with my day at least. But well there’s something else on my mind. We have to be able to understand what it is exactly, if we don’t? Then that’s something quite different now isn’t it? Yeah that’s what I was thinking.

Today feels like a sleepy day, I don't know why that is. It just feels that way. I wish I could figure out why life happens the way it does. But I don't understand how anything goes about in this life. If I could understand one thought in life...I think I'd like it to be able to grasp why we are here on this Earth. Is it because the aliens want us to become something better than we are? I mean they're the ones in charge right? I think they are.

I’m trying here, is that all which matters in this life? Trying your best? I don’t know or have a clue as to how that works. It’s just a life that we have to be able to get through. I think that’s how it works, maybe possibly. I really do not have a clue. I wish I did have an idea of how life worked, maybe then I’d be able to figure out what to do about all of this other nonsense.

Sometimes you want a slug to make a filename. A slug is a group of words where the punctuation is removed and spaces are replaced with hyphens. Here is a simple way to implement this in Java. (It’s met my needs so far.) /** * Returns a phrase into a slug ie: This Is Good (this-is-good.md) * @param input The text to transform into a slug * @return The slug of the text passed in */ public static String toSlug(String input) { return input .toLowerCase() .replaceAll("[^a-z0-9\\s]", "") // remove punctuation .trim() .replaceAll("\\s+", "-") // spaces → hyphens + ".md"; } It can use some work. I have noticed if you have a hyphen in the word you pass in, it will put – which you might not want. So yeah some tweaks can be added to it for sure.

Today is not going well, My phone isn’t working. I hate it. I need to get a new phone, but we have no funds for a new phone. Who knows what’s going on anymore. I hate it. I wish there was something we could do about it, but there isn’t. I mean yeah I need to get a new phone. But the money thing is making it difficult. I wish I could just snap my fingers and make my old phone work fine and dandy again, but I doubt life works that way. No, I know life doesn’t work that way.

If I had the ability, I think I would do something about it. By it I mean life. I need to be able to figure things out in this life, I'm not sure what that means exactly, but if life had the ability to be understood, then I'm sure it would have to do with something that is extra special. Special enough to be there for everything else out there in the world. I just wish I could see how special it all is. But I can't. So I will try and attempt to figure out whatever happens. Or what has happened, perhaps what will happen? I'm not sure. It's life, and that's all I know about it. Talk about a wild ride though. We just never understand what's going on most of the time, and that's what's scary. But we have to keep moving forward.

Let’s discuss whatever needs to be talked about today. Shall we? yeah I think we need to or something. I don’t know, or have a clue. It would be nice if I could understand whatever there was to understand. But I don’t get it all, I hardly even recognize that something needs to be understood to begin with. It can be quite annoying if you ask me. But what am I supposed to do about it all? I don’t have a clue.

I'm writing a book about Mental Health at the moment. About 19 hand written pages on 8 1/2" by 11" paper, it's one of those spiral notebooks, you know the kind you used in school? Yeah those. I thought about using a composition book, those are almost dead on accurate for page to page with the publishing company I go with. But eh, I can write long hand in a spiral notebook as it is. It works. So that's what I'm doing at the moment. I wonder if I'll ever finish it though. Or maybe I'll run out of ideas to write about? I fear that the most. But what can you do about it? I don't know. There doesn't appear to be much of anything to do when it comes down to it. But if there was, I would know how to do it right quick. Yeah, I know I might just be jumping the gun as far as this is concerned and worrying about nothing, but hey it's what I do best!

Ever wonder what gives about this life? Yeah I wonder that all the time. It becomes annoying at times if I'm being honest. But what are you going to do about it? I don't know. Life will continue on as it always does, and it won't give up until it's done with you. At least that's how I feel about the subject.

Updated the version number of commands. At this point I hope it works. It’s a simple diary/note taking application. There’s nothing really special about it really. Just something I came up with that would help my thought process. Whatever the case, it tends to help. For example this morning, I’m tried. I slept for most of the night. Got up at midnight for a little bit, but then went back to bed at one and slept until six a.m. So I should be wide awake at the moment, my brain needs to wake up. that’s all there is to it. But who knows, there’s just so much going on that I don’t have a clue what to believe or what to think at the moment. Is that a bad thing? I’m not sure. whatever the case, I’m sure I’ll be fine. I’m always just fine .

Dear Dad, Yeah it’s me again. I’m sure you’re getting tired of me talking to you like you’re in the same room as me, but I can’t get over the fact that you’re gone. Like gone gone. I miss you terribly. I don’t know what to do about it. I wish I could talk to you. Sometimes I do talk to you out loud or in my head sometimes. I hope you don’t mind, and I hope I’m not bothering you. I just need to talk to my dad! Is that too much to ask? Maybe it is. I don’t know. Love, Kyle

Why does this life feel this way? There’s got to be some reasoning behind it. I wish I had a reason for any of it, most of it, whatever there is I’m supposed to think or do or say. One of those things needs to become aparent.

I dreamed about my dad again last night. He took me suit and car shopping said I needed them both. Haven’t a clue why he said I needed them, but I went along with it. It was nice to be spoiled. He left mid dream though, as I realized he was in fact dead. So there wasn’t much going on after that in the dream. I wish I could figure out what’s going on with those kinds of dreams. I guess it’s whatever , but I really want to know what that whatever is meant to be. Is it a warning? A sign? I don’t know. It’s something, that’s for sure. I hope it’s nothing bad, because I don’t think I could handle or deal with that right now. I don’t want to deal with such a thought process. That would suck, and I’m already thinking about it. GAH!

Life has to be something better than what we can see around us. It must be a kind of utopia that’s just beyond that hill, or just a little bit after the horizon. Whatever the case, it has to be there. I don’t see any other way on how this would work. I think it’s up to us to make life better than it is. Does that make sense? I sure hope it does to someone who’s reading this. If it does then I’ve done something right. If it doesn’t? Well that’s another story for another time.

If I had a way to figure out what this life means, I’m not sure I would be able to figure much out or understand it. That’s what this life feels like at times. I can’t make this up at all. I wish I could, but well it doesn’t happen that way. Just a life out in the middle of it all. That’s life in a nutshell, don’t you get it? I highly doubt it at all. So much doubt in this life to be covered by many things. Yeah, something like that. It’s a complicated mess at times I do believe. But what can we do about it? I don’t know.

Welp today was a miserable day altogether. I don’t know what to say about it, it was just one of the worst days I’ve had mentally. I have to stay strong for my wife. She’s going through some stuff right now and I can’t be having issues when she needs me to be strong for her. So I guess I’ll just bury it all until I can’t do it anymore. I don’t know what to say about it all. I feel all sorts of lost at the moment. So that’s what’s going on.

Something about today worries me. I don’t know what that is yet. I’m sure it’s nothing. Let’s chalk it up to nothing, yes that would be a good idea. Nothing sounds better than worrying about something right? Yeah that’s what I’m thinking it has to do with. Nothing at all. Something gives you the heebeegeebies. Is that even a full word? Or is that two seperate words? I don’t have a clue.

It would be helpful to be able to figure out what this life is about. I mean we know there’s a purpose to it all right? This existence can’t be all for nothing at least I don’t think it can be. There’s got to be something greater out there. I wish we had access to all that was out there. Everything that has a purpose must find a way to exist. Is that even possible? I’m not certain. Something has to give in order for anything in this life to make sense. I don’t see how any of this could ever make sense though. I mean here we are and we haven’t gone anywhere but the Moon and that has no intelligent life on it at all. What about other planets out there in the galaxy? The universe? There’s gotta be something more out there.

They say life can come at you fast. I don’t doubt it at in the least. It is what keeps this life interesting and unique. We have to keep life from becoming stale. There is no other choice but to try and make it all work out. So that’s how everything tends to work at times. Unfortunately I do not make the rules. I doubt anyone really makes the rules. Yeah, I don’t get it either. If the rules aren’t set in stone which can and will change at any given moment, how are we meant to trust anything ever again.

There needs to be more sleep hours in the day. I could have used a bit more sleep this morning let’s face it. But that’s not going to happen now. Oh great I have hiccups now. I don’t know where that came from. Let’s see if I can hold my breath. If that helps then the hiccups will be gone and everything will be fine and dandy. Nope that’s not happening either. Dang it. Maybe I’ll get there maybe.

Life isn’t what everyone says it’s like. I’d like to think it’s something unique, but well it’s not. It’s something that comes along to everyone. We don’t have a say in the matter. We live, we live and we die. There’s nothing much else to it. I mean, if there were? Wouldn’t you think we could explain why everything works the way it does? Yeah, that’s what I was thinking. But we don’t get to have that choice in life. It’s a damning thing to make us worry over everything and nothing at all. But that’s life in a nutshell isn’t it? Yeah, that’s what I was thinking.

Sometimes you just have to see what’s out there and take a look around you. There could be people waiting for your help and you don’t even know it. When you feel a presence in your life to do something for someone else, take that and run with it. You never know who you’ll affect.

What on earth is going on here? I don’t have any idea of what to think or say. Life is getting in the way to be honest, but I wish it wasn’t. I wish it was being kinder to me. It needs to be kinder to me. Somehow I’m failing at life. I just don’t know what to do about any of it.

Had some nightmares last night, again. I don’t know what’s causing them…something for sure but I don’t enjoy or like them. They need to stop and I must find a way to make them stop. Last night it was something about a virus going around. It was spread by some kind of liquid compound. It was airborne and would also affect you on touch. Talk about a crazy dream right? To my knowledge there was no cure. At some point in the dream a cure did come along though? But people started messing with the pipes that caused the damn virus to come back. So we were all screwed.

Life wasn’t meant to be easy. [L]ife was simply meant to be. I don’t know exactly how this life was meant to be, but I do know life wasn’t meant to be crazy. What if life was meant to be something different? I mean here we are just waiting for something to come along right? What if it doesn’t come? What then?

Had a nightmare last night. I dreamed Dad died al over again. In my dream he managed to survive the choking incident in 2024 on Christmas Eve. The doc wanted to run some pressure tests by putting him in a huge tub of water, he would be fully submerged and wearing a mask so he could breathe. Well apparently it didn’t go so well. I received word in the mail from my uncle sending his condolences. I was in shock. How could he die? Again? My mom was furious that the doc waited a week to perform some kind of surgery on him. As I was talking to my mom I was choked up, I could barely breathe or talk. She then said I had leukemia in my brain and in my…appendix[?] Can’t remember where. I just broke down crying. Woke up in a panic and was very happy to see all was right in the world, that it was just a dream. But still, man. Talk about a trip!