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Blast From The Past: February 13, 2024 - I'll Be Fine

Updated the version number of commands. At this point I hope it works. It’s a simple diary/note taking application. There’s nothing really special about it really. Just something I came up with that would help my thought process. Whatever the case, it tends to help. For example this morning, I’m tried. I slept for most of the night. Got up at midnight for a little bit, but then went back to bed at one and slept until six a.m. So I should be wide awake at the moment, my brain needs to wake up. that’s all there is to it. But who knows, there’s just so much going on that I don’t have a clue what to believe or what to think at the moment. Is that a bad thing? I’m not sure. whatever the case, I’m sure I’ll be fine. I’m always just fine .
Recent posts

Dear Dad

Dear Dad, Yeah it’s me again. I’m sure you’re getting tired of me talking to you like you’re in the same room as me, but I can’t get over the fact that you’re gone. Like gone gone. I miss you terribly. I don’t know what to do about it. I wish I could talk to you. Sometimes I do talk to you out loud or in my head sometimes. I hope you don’t mind, and I hope I’m not bothering you. I just need to talk to my dad! Is that too much to ask? Maybe it is. I don’t know. Love, Kyle

Whatever It Brings

Why does this life feel this way? There’s got to be some reasoning behind it. I wish I had a reason for any of it, most of it, whatever there is I’m supposed to think or do or say. One of those things needs to become aparent.

Dreamed About Dad Again

I dreamed about my dad again last night. He took me suit and car shopping said I needed them both. Haven’t a clue why he said I needed them, but I went along with it. It was nice to be spoiled. He left mid dream though, as I realized he was in fact dead. So there wasn’t much going on after that in the dream. I wish I could figure out what’s going on with those kinds of dreams. I guess it’s whatever , but I really want to know what that whatever is meant to be. Is it a warning? A sign? I don’t know. It’s something, that’s for sure. I hope it’s nothing bad, because I don’t think I could handle or deal with that right now. I don’t want to deal with such a thought process. That would suck, and I’m already thinking about it. GAH!

Life Has To Be Something Better

Life has to be something better than what we can see around us. It must be a kind of utopia that’s just beyond that hill, or just a little bit after the horizon. Whatever the case, it has to be there. I don’t see any other way on how this would work. I think it’s up to us to make life better than it is. Does that make sense? I sure hope it does to someone who’s reading this. If it does then I’ve done something right. If it doesn’t? Well that’s another story for another time.

If I Had A Way

If I had a way to figure out what this life means, I’m not sure I would be able to figure much out or understand it. That’s what this life feels like at times. I can’t make this up at all. I wish I could, but well it doesn’t happen that way. Just a life out in the middle of it all. That’s life in a nutshell, don’t you get it? I highly doubt it at all. So much doubt in this life to be covered by many things. Yeah, something like that. It’s a complicated mess at times I do believe. But what can we do about it? I don’t know.

Blast From The Past: February 8, 2024 - I Don't Know Anymore

Welp today was a miserable day altogether. I don’t know what to say about it, it was just one of the worst days I’ve had mentally. I have to stay strong for my wife. She’s going through some stuff right now and I can’t be having issues when she needs me to be strong for her. So I guess I’ll just bury it all until I can’t do it anymore. I don’t know what to say about it all. I feel all sorts of lost at the moment. So that’s what’s going on.