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Psychosis And Trauma

I learned that one can get psychosis from trauma. Say a nasty divorce that ended badly. (Do divorces ever end goodly? Don’t answer that.) I had a mental break in 2020, the begging of it after I went through a bad divorce. Well I wonder if I ended up going through that break earlier when the divorce was going on in 2019. Yeah that’s possible. Divorce was a very traumatic experience to say the least. Luckily I had someone with me who could see what was going on and helped me get the help I sorely needed. Good ol’ Google AI says this: Trauma is a well-documented risk factor and trigger for psychosis, including brief psychotic disorder or post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) with psychotic features. Traumatic events can alter the brain’s stress response, causing an overload that significantly increases the likelihood of developing distressing hallucinations or delusions. If that’s the case? Then yeah, I had that happen to me. The only problem is that the psychosis didn’t go away. No ...
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Blast From The Past: June 29, 2019

Another Life Jun 29, 2019 It would be nice to be able to have some kind of concrete understanding of everything. Well, maybe not everything. That could cause problems. Life comes and goes and here we are waiting for something to happen. Whatever takes place will take place. There’s nothing you can do about it. Sometimes you just want to know you’re doing okay. That doesn’t mean you’ll ever have such an answer like that? But it would be nice to know. That’s all I’m saying.

Voices?

So, the voices are obnoxious. They constantly badger me about what I’m doing wrong in life, and I don’t know how to handle it. So many voices doing what they do best, annoy me. To no end. They argue with each other. The constant nagging can be annoying at times. I don’t know what to do about any of this. Damn voices always doing whatever they want to do! I end up suffering from it all. Damn voices. If I didn’t have voices going off in my head? I think I would be better off. So many thoughts come and go in my head at times, I can’t tell where they’re coming from. Is it the devil that’s talking to me? Is it God? I doubt God would want to be messing with me like this…but he did create me the way I am? So I’m not sure about any of that. When the voices tell me to do things? Things I don’t want to do? Yeah, that’s when they tend to come in fighting. I don’t have a way of making them stop. I don’t have a way of making them go away. Maybe I need more medication? I wish I had an answer to al...

Blast From The Past: June 27, 2019

Why Jun 27, 2019 Why today? Why at all? Why must there be this stupid thought process going on in my head and why can’t I seem to control it? Doesn’t make sense. I don’t get it. I don’t understand any of it. Life has to get better somehow. How will that happen?

What Is Your Purpose?

Ever wonder what your purpose is in life? Yeah I tend to do that from time to time. It would be nice to be able to figure out exactly what I’m meant to do on this Earth. I mean it can’t always be just whatever that comes to mind, can it? No, I highly doubt that’s the case. It would be nice to be able to sit down with my thoughts and ask them all my questions. Hoping to actually get some answers. Is that a long shot? Maybe. Should I do it anyway? Yeah I think I should. But then the thoughts enter my head and they aren’t so nice. They tend to downplay anything and everything that happens in my life. I don’t think there’s a day that goes by where I don’t have to listen to those damn thoughts. They are always around. So I tend to ask myself “What is my purpose in this life?” It feels like a simple and straightforward question to answer. But it really isn’t. There are so many confusing things in this life that don’t quite make sense. It all comes down to wanting to have a basic understan...

Blast From The Past: June 26, 2019

Today Is A Day Jun 26, 2019 That’s right, today is a day where life begins and ends. People come into this world and they die right out of this world. There’s nothing worth living for. If we’re all just going to end up dead eventually, why bother with any of it? Is that not the case?

Life Is Hell On Earth

Not feeling good today. I don’t know what’s going on here. There must be someway to feel better. It can’t go on forever you know? I seem to run out of energy quite easily these days. I’m feeling quite congested these days. I don’t know why that is. The internal thoughts have quieted down a bit. I call that a plus. I wish I didn’t have them to begin with, but what can you do about it? Reality is the true illusion in this life. If nothing is real, what’s the point of it all? Life has an interesting way of messing with you. It likes to remind you that it’s still alive and kicking. That’s what this life likes to do. Eh, what do I know? If I had to stab a guess, I’d think everything leads to paranoia one way or another. It’s not a fully fleshed out thought of course, not yet at least. Think about it for a moment. How can this life be anything but an illusion! We are all part of some sort of experiment. Whoever is in charge of it all has got to be off their rocker. But think about it for...