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What Is Life

Thu May 7 06:13:38 AM MDT 2026 Another day ha come, what’s there to be saida bout it? I’m not quite sure. I mean it’s here. My alarm went off at four am this morning because of things that need to be done. It happens. Life that is. We all get so caught up and so busy that we forget to breathe once in a while. I suppose it kind of makes sense, do a degree. Doesn’t mean it will always make sense though. I highly doubt that will ever take place or happen. I’d like to think for a moment that this life gets better. I mean it has to get better at some point, doesn’t it? I don’t understand what goes on in this life most days. I wish I did. O tjoml ot has to do with my depression keeping me at bay most days. I can’t be for sure about that of course, but I do believe that’s what does it for me. I have to tell myself I’m okay with that. But truth be told? I’m not okay with that. It’s freakin’ depression for crying out loud! How am I supposed to be okay with depression? I can’t. There’s no wa...
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Psychosis

Ah, Psychosis . Such an interesting word. Google a definition, and you will find out a lot about it. Or I could give you the definition here without warning. Psychosis is a mental health condition characterized by a loss of contact with reality, often involving hallucinations (seeing/hearing things not there) and delusions (fixed, false beliefs). It is not a specific disease but a set of symptoms, commonly involving confused thinking, speech, and behavior. Common causes include schizophrenia , bipolar disorder , severe stress, and substance misuse. Yeah, that ought to do it. Now, I can hear you asking, why am I talking about this again ? Well because it’s an important topic. It needs to be talked about and not just swept under the rug as it were. A lot of people tend to sweep mental illness under the rug as it were. It can be quite intense. When you aren’t quite sure what is real anymore and everything feels like an invasion of your privacy. Like, what is real these days? I’m n...
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Blast From The Past: May 3, 2018

Thu May 3 18:35:57 MDT 2018 There needs to be a way to simply exist. Something out there must allow for such a concept? Perhaps not. Yet, if we do exist and nothing else is to be had from it all, I suppose we aren’t growing. Growth is the key to life. It’s not really the best idea or option at times. But hey, it’s growth right? Yes, something like that. Growth to do that which you need to do. To be able to have that peace of mind to continue working towards that greater good. Whatever the case, growth seems and appears to come and go at will. Who’s will that be? I’m not certain. It would be nice to find out someday.
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Once In A Lifetime

There are many times in this life where we wonder what’s going on with it. It would be nice to be able to figure everything out once and for all. But I don’t think that’s how this life is meant to work. I think life is meant to be full of surprises. If we could guess and dictate how our lives go, I don’t think there would be any mystery to it all. We need the mystery of life. There has to be something we have to keep guessing at. Something to keep us on our toes. So, let it happen. No matter what happens in this life, remember this one thing. You can control your destiny. There’s nothing stopping you from achieving your dreams. There isn’t anything we can’t do, the skies the limit. Isn’t that the saying? The skies the limit? Yeah, something like that. If we aren’t able to see the future, we can only see the present and take the experiences from the past. We do this in order to become the better version of ourselves. Isn’t that what we want the most? To become a better more enlighte...
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Over Thinking

Thoughts tend to get in the way a lot of the time. Let's face it, this life is full of thoughts. Some thoughts are are good, other thoughts are considered bad. Then there are the in-between thoughts that don't make any sense at all. Sometimes I don't mind the thoughts. They can do whatever they want in my mind. Then there are other times that I simply do not like the thoughts. They need to stop and I can't control them. I can't tell them enough that I need them to stop, they don't stop unfortunately and they run their course. So I deal with it. I live with it. I allow it to overtake me and my mind. Not the most healthiest way to deal with something mind you, but I don't know how else to deal. Intrusive thoughts tend to get in the way sometimes. They're relentless and don't stop. I wish I had some way to make them simply go away, but they seem to continue to come and don't want to leave me alone. So I deal with t...
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Suicidal Ideation

The thoughts come a little easily some days, other days they aren't that easy. The following quote comes from Cleveland Clinic . Suicidal ideation (suicidal thoughts) are thoughts or ideas centered around death or suicide. Experiencing suicidal ideation doesn’t mean you’re going to kill yourself, but it can be a warning sign. Throwing myself in front of a moving car, jumping out of a moving car, hanging myself. I have thought about each of these from one time to another. Throwing myself down a stairwell in an office building is another example. Sounds easy doesn't it? Just simply allow it to happen. Doesn't mean it will always happen, but someday it might. You just never know. They all feel perfectly natural to me. Deep down inside I know they are wrong and I shouldn't allow them to affect my thought process on life, yet here they are. They continue to mess with my mind and there's nothing I am able to do about it. I'm sure there is...
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Crazy

Being called crazy by other people hurts. How dare they label me. I can call myself crazy, that's one thing. But when someone else calls me crazy? How dare they have the nerve to even utter such words. They don't have the right to determine if I am crazy or not. They don't have the right to say that about me. Yet they do. Oh they try and say, forgive me if I'm being rude but...yeah you should have stopped before you said but. You're being rude ok? That's all there is to it. I mean how would they feel if I called them crazy? I highly doubt they would enjoy that. I don't call them crazy by the way, that would be down right rude. Wikipedia says the following about "crazy". "Crazy" is a word that is often used to describe abnormal mental or behavioral patterns. In psychiatry , "crazy" may refer to psychosis , which is the presence of delusions , hallucinations , and disorganization of thou...
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