Ever stop to wonder what’s in a simple day like today? There’s no guarantee that today will bring about anything substantial. In fact, today could be a big flop on the ground and no one would notice. I don’t know how any of that tends to work out though. It’s life right? Oh life, what are you even on about? I don’t understand you at times. It would be nice to be able to grasp something, even if it’s out of thin air, to understand and realize what that’s all about. But alas I cannot do that. It is life after all, and we cannot really understand anything that comes our way. If I had the ability to realize my own potential, I think I could benefit from it all. But I don’t know how to do that. It’s a shame really, to want to be able to do something with this life and then to be stuck without any reason for it? Yeah, no bueno.
My mother once told me that if you want to be happy get married. Tried that twice now and it didn't work out. I don't know what her secret was, but it sure didn't work out for me. I'm angry. I'm mad. I have no one else to blame but myself. There's nothing I can do about it. What's done is done. I have to move on. What else can I do? There's nothing to do. I can only accept my fate as it has been laid out for me. I have to accept that fact and be okay with it.
I hate when there's nothing to do about a given situation. But when you have no options, there's nothing you are able to do about it. And that's all there is to it. So, this life becomes one big giant screw up, and I have to pick up the pieces and move forward somehow.
This life doesn't feel worth it. I don't know what gives about all of that, but this life just doesn't feel worth anything I put into it. So why bother. Who cares anymore what happens to me. I wish I could just be happy and say everything is alright, but it's not. Life wasn't meant to be this way.
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