I am rather anxious today. I think it has to do with the medication(s) I am on at the moment. Doctor changed some medications, added some, did some other things put me back on medications I haven’t been on in a while…the same ol’ same ol’. Anti-Psychotic meds work wonders when they work, they’re amazing. When your mind doesn’t want them to work? Well, that’s when things become quite a problem. I hate to admit it, but life doesn’t always work the way we want it to work. What can I say? It’s a mess at times. There’s nothing wrong with that, but to say it’s not complex is a complete overhaul of whatever there is. Talk about a mixed bag of nuts. Someone doesn’t understand everything there is to understand about it all. If I wasn’t anxious, today would be a better day than it is. But, well I am so there’s nothing I can do about it. I wish there was…but there isn’t so I’ll just have to deal with whatever comes my way. Such a bummer if you think about it all. Nothing is ever cureable. Every...
Do I have to die to be understood in this life? I’m not sure if that’s an unreasonable thought process. It doesn’t mean I’m going to take my own life, no that’s not the point at all. There tends to be something in this life that keeps me from taking my life. I don’t know what that is to be honest. If I did? Hell, I could tell you! But since I don’t have the answer for any of that, well I guess I’m stuck here waiting for something else to take place and happen. It doesn’t mean life will get better by any means. It could mean that I won’t get a good nights sleep until I can figure it all out. Too many close calls over the years. I’m not sure I should even try and remember what happened to them all, but they were real to me. It would be nice to be able to not worry or fret over any of that though. So many things have gone good in life and so many things have gone bad in life. It’s all part of the make up that is life I suppose. So where does that leave me? Huh? Where does that leave me ...