Is It Really Over?

 Ever come across something in your life and you wonder if it's really over? That's the dilemma I'm facing right now. Is it over. Is it really over. Like really this time. In the past it never lasted beyond a month, but I feel like this time it's for real. I feel crushed. Actually, I don't know how to feel. Something I thought would last forever and a day, and it's over in a sentence. It doesn't make any sense, and I don't know what to do about it. Man, life is hard. Why does it have to be this difficult? It was so calmly explained and calmly accepted. Like I knew it was the right decision, but it hurts.

They won't have to worry about me ever again. No one should have to worry about me ever again. I feel broken. Something inside me is telling me I'm worthless. No one cares, nor should they have a care in the world about me. I make life difficult for others. I deserve it. Why should I reason otherwise? Nothing matters anymore. I'm being thrown away into the trash. I can't look back after this. There's nothing to look back to. It's over.

Who cares. Do you care? Why should you. There's no reason to care. Not anymore.

Life came to me one day
it told me of great things to come
and came they did
but they only lasted a second

Why would life do this
I wondered to myself
listening to my own thoughts
and wondering how it would affect my life

It made me a mess
I would cry in the night
but no one was there to listen
and life was nowhere to be found

I thought this was the one
to be with me through thick and thin
maybe I was wrong
and life just ends

Do you ever have a time in your life where you think something is going to last, and yet it doesn't? It would be nice to be able to pick up the pieces of my life, but I don't know how to do that. How does one pick up the pieces of their life and put them back together when there's a big gaping hole in the puzzle. I don't understand how that is accomplished. So many questions and decisions to be made. Do they all have to be made at once? That's overwhelming to me.

Life screams at me sometimes. It has this ability to make me uncomfortable. I do not understand what's going on at times. I am not a fan. I need to be somewhere where I belong. Is that too much to ask for?