Missing My Dad And Other Things

Sun May 17 04:56:34 PM MDT 2026

Missing Dad

I am missing my dad so much today. I don’t know how I can get through this life without thinking about him everyday of my life. I don’t know what to do about it. I mean I’m here, he’s not. He’s dead. There are so many emotions that come flooding in from time to time and I can’t seem to deal with any of them. It would be nice not to worry about anything anymore. I worry about the life after this one the most. What’s going to happen when we all die? Who will be there waiting on the other side for us? I hope my dad finds me. I hope he hasn’t forgotten about me.

There are things in this life that don’t always make sense. I think living and dying are some of those things. It would be nice to be able to really understand what’s going on and figure it all out day by day, minute by minute. I don’t know if there’s an option for that though. Life seems to get in the way at times. It’s rather annoying. I don’t want it to be in the way of anything though. I’d rather it all be dealt with without all the hoops to jump through. Yet here I am worrying about such things. Do they even really matter? I’m not sure.

I just want life to make sense. Is that too much to ask? I’m pretty sure it’s not. But if it is? Then I don’t want to know what isn’t too much to ask. There’s just a lot going on in life most of the time, and I wish I had a way of dealing with it. All of it all at once. I don’t want to piece it together one day at a time. That hurts my brain most of the time. I’d rather it all make sense right now. But I guess that’s too much to ask for sometimes. Bummer.

Feeling Depressed and Worthless, Hopeless

I feel depressed today. I don’t know why I feel that way. I just do. It would be nice not to feel this way, but I can’t seem to help it. Life gets in the way and there are so many things to think about and consider. Living life is a big concern for me. How am I meant to make everything meet in the middle if things don’t come together the way I want them to? It feels like I’m losing some major battle somehow. Small wars being fought all over and I’m losing every single one of them.

That bullshit of losing the battle but winning the war doesn’t even help. Because I’m pretty sure I’m losing the war as well. There are so many depressing thoughts that enter into my brain from time to time that I don’t know how to get over them. There has to be something I can do. Anything that will make it all go away quickly. But I’m not sure how to do that, so I guess I’ll just be stuck here waiting for something else to happen and then I might find a way to overcome that and then onto the next hurdle as it were.

I Don’t Get It

There are so many things in this life that I simply do not get or understand. It would be nice to be able to understand something about this life. But I’m not sure I do. I’m not sure I can. It’s all a mystery at times and there’s nothing I can do to get it out of my head. I hate it. It’s nothing like I want it to be. There’s always something out there waiting to get us. I don’t know what that something is, but I know it’s there.

This life will eventually come to an end. It has to. There’s nothing out there that will keep life moving forward. It will stop at a dead silence. A wall that you cannot pass or go through. There’s a little bit of this and that in the mix that we don’t always have the answers to. It’s funny how that tends to work out. The answers will come eventually, just not when we want them to come.

Talk about a terrible idea or thought process. But that’s life for you! Without such thoughts we would be nowhere and we could do nothing. So take it for what it is and allow it to flow through you. There won’t come another time in this life for you to make these decisions and have these experiences.

Life Is Hard

Let’s face it, this life is hard. I’m not here to tell you how to deal with your life, that’s up to you how to choose to deal with it. There’s nothing wrong with that. Life will come at you and you’ll never know how best to deal with whatever it is you have to deal with. That’s what this life is all about. Choosing what it is you want to learn about and understanding what’s right and wrong. Choosing the right from the wrong in order to make your life better than it currently is.

What makes this life difficult though? I don’t know if I have the answer to that question. It would be nice if I did have all the answers to this life. But that would take a mind reader. I’m no mind reader, I’m far behind that curve of it all. There’s no one in this world that is an actual mind reader. If someone tells you they are? They’re lying. Don’t believe them.

There’s a simple part of life that we often forget about. Don’t allow the past to get you down. Without that knowledge, we can’t move on from the past and look into the future. The future is where we want to be. We don’t want to be stuck in the past. If we’re stuck in the past, there’s no going back. There’s nothing we can do about it. That’s what this life is all about, growing and becoming better than we currently are. So let yourself become the better you that you can be. Don’t get caught up in the past and things that should have been different. You don’t want to be messing with that.

The Future Is Unknown

The funny thing about the future is this. It’s unknown to us. We don’t have a clue what will happen tomorrow or five or ten years from now. There’s nothing in this world that can tell us how everything will eventually go. That’s the beauty of the future. It has the ability to be mysterious, so mysterious in fact that we simply don’t know how it will unfold. No one’s future has been written yet. That’s another beautiful thing about it. It will eventually be written but there’s nothing keeping us here in the present. The future will come and we can only hold on for the ride to come to a complete stop. That’s death by the way, but even then there’s a future out there waiting to be discovered.

The future will be here before you know it. Every second that ticks by is another second into the future. It’s always coming for us. There is no end to it.

Why Do I Care?

There’s a good question to ask. What’s the point in caring about whatever happens in this life? It’s going to happen no matter what you do or don’t do as it is. There’s no point in worrying about whatever will happen or won’t happen. You just have to strap yourself in and wait for the ride to get started.

So what’s the point in wondering what will happen in this life? If it’s going to come and happen anyway, why bother with it? Seems so easy to think of it in a way that won’t matter. If life comes and goes then there’s no point in worrying about whatever will come next. Can’t we just leave it at that? Maybe that’s where it’s meant to be left. I don’t know for sure.

So … let’s leave it at that, shall we?