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Life Is A Journey

Life wasn’t meant to be this way. We wake up every morning and try to get through it just to go to bed and wake up again the next day. Is that what we’re thinking? Is that what we want? I’m not sure, actually I’m sure it’s not what we want at all. Yet it’s what we do. We are here to figure things out and try to attempt new things meeting new people. That’s what life is about I think? I guess? Either way, here we are. Now, if we wanted to do something a little different, we could. Life could be much different than it currently is. But, we have to accept that it could be different. Either way? It won’t be useful to any of us until we decide that is what we want. But what do we want for real now? I mean, we could guess all day long what we want, but we cannot fully express ourselves for some reason. Does it matter? I’m not sure. I’d rather not think about everything which could go wrong with this plan, but well you have to take into account all the different angles, don’t you? Some woul...
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Psychosis

Ah, Psychosis. Such an interesting word. Google a definition, and you will find out a lot about it. Or I could give you the definition here without warning.

Psychosis is a mental health condition characterized by a loss of contact with reality, often involving hallucinations (seeing/hearing things not there) and delusions (fixed, false beliefs). It is not a specific disease but a set of symptoms, commonly involving confused thinking, speech, and behavior. Common causes
include schizophrenia, bipolar disorder, severe stress, and substance misuse.

Yeah, that ought to do it. Now, I can hear you asking, why am I talking about this again? Well because it’s an important topic. It needs to be talked about and not just swept under the rug as it were. A lot of people tend to sweep mental illness under the rug as it were.

It can be quite intense. When you aren’t quite sure what is real anymore and everything feels like an invasion of your privacy. Like, what is real these days? I’m not certain I understand anymore It would be nice to be able to believe in something that I know won’t turn on its head or disappear all the way. Yeah, that’s what I’m thinking about these days.

What am I missing in all of this? Is it the fact that this life is a simulation? Is that what’s going on with life? I don’t know. It would be nice to have some kind of understanding behind it all. But I don’t know how to do that. I don’t want to go to a therapist in order to do anything. I want to be able to figure it all out by myself.

Is it possible I am never to understand what is going on with me? I can appreciate that for sure, but I’m not sure if I can understand it. There are so many things that I am just unable to understand at times. I wish I could make everything just make sense. But I know I can’t do that. There are limitations to this life, some limitations aren’t the easiest to overcome. While others seem nonexistent. Whichever way this life swings, we are simply stuck in an ongoing circle. There isn’t a way to overcome any of it. It’s an unfortunate series of events in which we live.

What is this life all about anyway? I don’t get it most of the time. I do know the hallucinations are quite real. There’s nothing that can be done about those. I hate to say it, but most days they’re just there and I have to deal with them.

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