Ever stop to wonder what’s in a simple day like today? There’s no guarantee that today will bring about anything substantial. In fact, today could be a big flop on the ground and no one would notice. I don’t know how any of that tends to work out though. It’s life right? Oh life, what are you even on about? I don’t understand you at times. It would be nice to be able to grasp something, even if it’s out of thin air, to understand and realize what that’s all about. But alas I cannot do that. It is life after all, and we cannot really understand anything that comes our way. If I had the ability to realize my own potential, I think I could benefit from it all. But I don’t know how to do that. It’s a shame really, to want to be able to do something with this life and then to be stuck without any reason for it? Yeah, no bueno.
I am depressed. There's no other way of saying it. Being depressed has a way of messing with your head. Getting out of bed is a chore somedays. I am not a fan of it, but it's something I have to endure. I don't know who gave me this depression, was it God? I suppose it doesn't matter. There's just too much to worry about right now. I hate worrying. The anxiety alone is just terrible.
The depression tells me I can't do anything, but the anxiety tells me if I don't do something, I'll be in trouble. It's downright frustrating. I am not a fan of it all. What more is there to say about it though. I guess there's a lot more to say. Depression isn't just something you get over. It takes its toll on you. I wish I could overcome all of this. But I don't see a way out of it.
Too much to think about right now.
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