Ever stop to wonder what’s in a simple day like today? There’s no guarantee that today will bring about anything substantial. In fact, today could be a big flop on the ground and no one would notice. I don’t know how any of that tends to work out though. It’s life right? Oh life, what are you even on about? I don’t understand you at times. It would be nice to be able to grasp something, even if it’s out of thin air, to understand and realize what that’s all about. But alas I cannot do that. It is life after all, and we cannot really understand anything that comes our way. If I had the ability to realize my own potential, I think I could benefit from it all. But I don’t know how to do that. It’s a shame really, to want to be able to do something with this life and then to be stuck without any reason for it? Yeah, no bueno.
When a family member tells you they'd rather just live out their days remaining instead of having surgery. It tugs at the heart strings a bit. I honestly don't know how to process this. My brain has been in a jumble ever since. Medication can only go so far and that's not saying much.
So I have to be supportive of their decision. There's nothing else I can do about it. I mean what can be done? I don't know, I don't have a clue. I wish I knew what to say, but all I can do is try and think positive.
There are so many factors at play here that I cannot list them all. That's jut the facts of it.
Sometimes I hate this life.
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