Skip to main content

What Is This Life?

 Ever wonder what this life is all about? Like it's some kind of dream or something. It doesn't feel real. It feels fake like. Does that make sense? I'm not sure if it does, but in a way it does to me. There are so many things in this life that just don't make sense to me and here I sit in wonder of it all I just have to sit back and wonder about it and not move forward with any of it until I am able to have a coherent thought about all of it. Yeah, something like that.

It would be nice to be able to simply look forward and hope for something good in life. How can I do that effectively? My brain looks for disaster all of the time. There's nothing I haven't thought of, and that is a scary thought. So many possibilities out there of what can happen. So many things that might happen, and that alone scares me half to death.

You'd think I would be able to figure out everything that goes on in this life. But I don't think I am able to, not right now. I don't know when I'm able to figure out anything really. I just sit here wondering about whatever there is to wonder about. That's just what this life does to me, I guess. I mean what else is there to do but try and figure out everything that happens to us in this life? That's what I am faced with most days and that scares the shit out of me.

I want to be able to figure out whatever there is to figure out in this life. I don't want to just believe something because it was told to me and that I need to believe in it. That's what things feel at times and it's wrong to me. So very wrong, but that's how it feels at times.

Life will get better.

Labels:

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Suicidal Ideation

 Over the years I've had to deal with suicidal ideation. Those are thoughts of being dead, some more extreme than others. It causes issues for me a lot of the time. It's not an easy thing to talk about at all. Here's what it is: Suicidal ideation ( suicidal thoughts )  are thoughts or ideas centered around death or suicide . Experiencing suicidal ideation doesn’t mean you’re going to kill yourself, but it can be a warning sign.
Post a Comment
Read more

Didn't Sleep

 What's the point of sleep anymore if I can't sleep? I don't think I slept any good last night. I was awake at 3 am wondering to myself, what on earth am I doing awake? Yeah, that happened. It doesn't make any sense. Fortunately, it's the weekend. So, I can catch up on sleep tonight. I don't have to be anywhere tomorrow, so it's a good opportunity to actually sleep for once. Whatever the case, I hope I'll be able to fall asleep and stay asleep. We will see what happens.
Post a Comment
Read more

Thinking About Life

So sleepy today, I don't know why that is. Trying to watch the Super Bowl, but I just feel like I want to fall asleep. Talk about nuts and crazy, yet here I am. I don't have a clue who I want to win the game. I've chosen to root for the 49ers only because I've been told that I have to choose. Haha! Yeah it's that crazy if you ask me. Oh well, I'm sure whoever wins the game it will all work outin the end. I'm not feeling well. Let's face it, I could be having a mental break at the moment but I just don't know. I hope that's not the case, if it were then I have to figure things out and fix them. That's all there is to it. Nothing more than that. Storing these thoughts in a database is a good idea I think. I can query a database for certain key words and go from there. It's a good thing for sure. So yeah that's all there is to it. With the thought of a 4th voice in my head/mind, I am afriad to go to sleep. What if it follows me aroun...
Post a Comment
Read more