Ever stop to wonder what’s in a simple day like today? There’s no guarantee that today will bring about anything substantial. In fact, today could be a big flop on the ground and no one would notice. I don’t know how any of that tends to work out though. It’s life right? Oh life, what are you even on about? I don’t understand you at times. It would be nice to be able to grasp something, even if it’s out of thin air, to understand and realize what that’s all about. But alas I cannot do that. It is life after all, and we cannot really understand anything that comes our way. If I had the ability to realize my own potential, I think I could benefit from it all. But I don’t know how to do that. It’s a shame really, to want to be able to do something with this life and then to be stuck without any reason for it? Yeah, no bueno.
Dealing with some things as of late. Two people who I care about dearly are both having heart problems. I feel torn across the country as they live in different states. I can't physically be there for both of them at the same time. So, I had to choose. I keep going back and forth in my mind if I made the right choice. Who I should be with at this critical stage of time etc. I hope I made the right choice. I simply don't know.
Not knowing is a big thing to deal with somedays. Here they are under two different doctors at two different hospitals under different care. One more critical than the other. Yet still both having problems.
It's not an easy thing to say the least. I wish I could be there for both of them. But I can't. I pray for both of them that they will both come out of their operations okay, and nothing will befall them. I don't know how else to put it. I only ask for God's help if He's out there and listening to me.
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