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Living Life Is A Mess At Times

Let’s face it, life can be a cruel bastard at times. I’m not sure what to make of it. I’d like to think that like with anything, life is possible to become so much more than it currently is. But I’m not so sure about that. Hell, there’s a lot of things I’m not sure about these days. But that doesn’t stop me from trying to become a better human than what I currently am. Isn’t that the point in life? To become better than who we currently are? Yeah, that’s what I was thinking. Oh well, if we can’t become better in this life, we can certainly die trying. I guess that’s a main staple in life that we die trying to do whatever it is we possibly can do. Not always what we want to do mind you, but what we are able to do. There’s a difference in wanting and able I’m finding out. It can be a pretty big difference given the circumstances.
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Dear Dad

February 16, 2026

Dear Dad,

What I would give to be with you right now. I know how that sounds. It doesn’t sound good at all. I just miss you. I want to be where you are. I feel a bit jealous that you got to move onto what’s next while I’m still here on Earth trying to figure out this life stuff. I get why I’m still alive, I mean what’s there not to get or understand? I still have stuff to do down here on Earth. I just can’t give up and go to the afterlife ya know? Yeah that.

Life isn’t very easy right now. It kinda sucks to be honest. But I’m trying to do my best to make the most out of it. I mean what else can I do? Not much I’m afraid. That’s just how this life rolls.

I can’t remember exactly what it was, but I was reminded of you the other day. I remember thinking, yeah my dad would love this. I wish I could remember what it was I was thinking about, or what I saw, or … well it was something you would have liked.

I know there were times I was a disappointment to you, and I’m sorry about that. I wish I could take it all back and have made things right somehow. But I also know that’s not part of the deal with this life. So I’m sorry for everything I did that was a disappointment to you, I’m sorry that I let you down.

All I can do is move forward right? Yeah that’s what I thought.

Love,

Kyle

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