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I Want To Die

Have you ever wanted to escape this world and simply die or get away from it? Yeah, that's how I feel at times. I don't know what to do about it. I need to see a therapist or something. I'm on medication, but that doesn't feel like it's doing enough for me. So I have to figure out...something to do about it all. I don't know though. It scares me. I'm more than scared, if I had the ability to understand what was going on in life, then I could do that. But I can't and that simply seems that life is going to blow up at me in any second now. I wish I could overcome these thoughts and simply make sense of it. Whatever happens, I need reality to be real. Does that make sense? I'm not sure it does. I doubt anything ever makes sense to me anymore. But that's okay. It'll be okay in the end, whenever that will be. If it's not the end, it's not okay yet now is it? No, I didn't think so.

My Shoes Are Too Tight


There's a line in B5 where Londo says something to the effect that his shoes are too tight but that is okay for he has forgotten how to dance. When asked about it by Vir not understanding the statement, Londo says nor should he.

The answer to the quote is simple. Don't ignore the things in life that are enjoyable. Before long you won't be able to dance and explore those things, your shoes will be too tight.

I'd like to think I'm like Vir not understanding the statement, but I think I know better. Life has become a burden at times and there's nothing I can do to get around it.

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